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Sarah Shares - Part 7 - Reevaluating our normal, moving forward

5/31/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Series #SarahShares • Part 7 • Reevaluating Our Normal, Moving Forward➡️
All I can say is sometimes I find myself literally day dreaming of the day where we will say:
"Hey, remember those times when we were in quarantine...." and then chat about the life we lived "back then". 

​As I mentioned in Part 6, I want to rejoice when I look back on these moments because we will  never get them again (or at least I hope NOT!). I also mentioned, all of this new normal makes us reflect on what we took for GRANTED only 79 days ago (and probably for much longer as time goes on). Who knows when we will get back to what we knew as "normal".... But my question today is: was that normal healthy? was that even a normal we want to go back to? 

I talked a lot this week about: adapting to new realities and focusing on what we can control (in Part 1), being able to serve others and being a light of hope for them (in Part 2), the extra struggle extroverts are having (in Part 3), the joys of accepting the natural versions of ourselves (dans la partie 4), dealing with the mental consequences of quarantine (in Part 5) and coming out of this pandemic a victor or a victim (dans la partie 6). That being said, in each part written and recorded throughout the week, there has been SO much learning and SO much reflecting. Reflecting on the previous normal, the "new" normal and the normal we will be able to create in the future. 

Considering WHAT our normal was and reimagining WHAT it will consist of in order to mold it according to what we have LEARNT about ourselves during these trying times is my final reflection, for the last part of my blog series.

HOW will the lessons in your rearview mirror affect WHAT YOU SEE IN DO when you're looking out your windshield?

Take time to recollect what you used to know as regular and as routine: 
Where were you putting your energy? Was it in line with your values or were you simply in the hamster wheel? What do you miss the most about your ordinary life? But, what elements and lessons from these extraordinary times can you integrate down the road when all of the dust settles?

Now, we have all heard the saying: 
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but when it all passes, what matters the most is that we have learned; 
as my friend Rafiki once said:
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I don't think there's a better way to end this 7 part blog and podcast series than with a Disney quote! I can't even say it was planned because each day I sat down at my laptop with a few sentences, from the Notes on my phone, and a global idea of what I was going to write about. The best part was letting the creative juices flow out of me and simply write for pleasures sake. 

I don't know when I'll come back to these thoughts and deliberations but it was really cool reflecting publicly for the past 7 days on my blog and podcast platform, for my own self and for you all! 

Hey, you can do ANYTHING for a week, you should try it out, you got lots of time! 
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Sarah Partage - Partie 6 - Vainqueur ou victime?

5/29/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Série #SarahPartage • Partie 7 • Vainqueur ou victime? □
Avertissement :  Dans cet article, on utilise le terme « victime » pour décrire une personne ayant une certaine attitude face à notre situation actuelle de confinement. En aucun cas est-ce qu'on ne parle de gens victimes de la maladie du coronavirus et je ne veux surtout pas alléger la gravité médicale de notre contexte. Certaines personnes et leurs familles vivent de chose bien pire que le confinement. Notons que les gens atteints de la maladie qui s'en sortent sont aussi de grands vainqueurs.
Vous êtes-vous déjà posé la question: qu'est-ce que je vais ressortir de cette pandémie? Moi, je dois vous avouer que je me la pose souvent. Ma réponse est habituellement: je veux en ressortir avec une appréciation pour la vie, la routine (ou manque d'une), la nature, le son des oiseaux et le beau temps!


Tu pourrais aussi répondre avec: je vais être une personne plus sage, plus zen, plus en forme (ou peut-être moins en forme); je vais être guitariste/chef, je vais sortir avec beaucoup de belles mémoires, je vais être plus autodidacte, etc.  


Peu importe l'élément que tu ressors de cette première question, il y aura tout simplement DEUX types des personnes qui émergeront de cette pandémie:
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Des vainqueurs et des victimes
​


​les vainqueurS AURONT:

  • cultivé une meilleure connaissance de soi
  • développé une appréciation pour les petits moments
  • acquis de meilleures habiletés d'adaptations 
  • connu croissance personnelle exponentielle 
  • éprouvé de la gratitude pour leur santé et bien-être
  • réévalué leurs vieilles habitudes, dépenses et routines
  • peut-être même, réussis des projets personnels qui étaient mis sur pause!


​lES VICTIMES AURONT:

  • accepté que certaines choses ne soient pas possibles au lieu de trouver des solutions 
  • échappé des occasions d'apprendre de nouvelles compétences
  • justifié des dépenses (et/ou dettes) pour combler un certain vide
  • manqué l'occasion d'épargner pour leur futurs objectifs 
  • accepté que le « nouveau normal » allait les empêcher de vivre pleinement et d'être heureux  ​
Une évaluation plus critique de chaque liste m'apporte à la réalisation qu'il faut être INTENTIONNEL pour être vainqueur.  Intentionnel avec son temps, son attitude et son énergie! Dépensez ceux-ci aux BONS endroits feront en sorte que vous serez aussi des vainqueurs! 

❝ Ayez le CARACTÈRE d'UN VAINQUEUR
ET NON D'UNE VICTIME. 

Donc, comment allez-vous ressortir de ce confinement les bras haut dans les airs sur le podium des vainqueurs? Allez-vous planifié? Vous questionner? Vous trouver des alliés?
Peu importe vos stratégies, assurez-vous qu'elles soient gagnantes et qu'elles vous apportent à VOTRE ligne d'arrivée, même si ça veut dire subir quelques éraflures en chemin...

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Sarah Shares - part 5 - covid-19 is a mental game

5/28/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Series #SarahShares • Part 5 • COVID-19 is a Mental Game
I was driving a few days ago when all of a sudden: "COVID-19 is a mental game" emerges from my mind like a candy bar being dispensed from a machine! Does that only happen to me? When your brain spits out pithy expressions...  

Why did my brain decide it was going to tell me this pithy claim? Well, probably because I have been dealing with all of the mental side effects that these times have created. 

In my opinion, this pandemic has been WAY more of a threat to my mental health than to my physical health. (I am not saying that the virus is not agressive or serious, but that I have had to take care of my mental health as a CONSEQUENCE of not wanting to get PHYSICALLY sick. Meaning... staying in my house in isolation like the rest of you). 

Taking care of yourself physically and mentally has always been a FULL time job. (And it should be our number one priority). For most of us, before all this, we had fabulous routines that were more or less balanced and allowed us to focus on different spheres of our lives. Whereas now, we are learning to adapt to doing everything we used to do, but in the confinements of our own homes. 

Some of my most useful mental health practices were things I can NO LONGER do such as working quietly in local coffee shops, practicing yoga at my local studio, having drinks with colleagues in local bars and spending time with my extended family for Sunday suppers gathered around the kitchen table. And I will be honest by saying, no longer having access to all of those locations, activities and events REALLY shook my up for quite some time.

I am sure I am not the only one who felt lost and like I had to restart from scratch to find NEW ways to get grounded, check-in with my mind/body and take time for ME. So I want to know:
​
What have been your BEST mental health practices you have discovered or rediscovered that have been helpful to you during quarantine?

​ON TOP of not having ou go-to strategies to get us rebalanced and grounded, our minds are unwillingly being tested; their buzzing and bouncing around all over the place, trying to process new feelings, unexpected realities and unwelcome problems. This is most caused by, what I like to call: UNCERTAINTY and LACK OF CONTROL. 
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Uncertainty will take us down. Letting that uncertainty (driven by anxiety) take control of our minds and our emotions is dangerous. I sometimes find myself going there in my mind and the red flags go up. I know, when I get lost in my thoughts, I start to worry and I don't have my two feet in the present. I try to project myself too far into the future and that is an unhealthy territory. Why is it unhealthy? Because me, you, your neighbour, or anyone have NO CONTROL over our future. And, guess what -  we never have. It is just a lot more evident now. 

That uncertainty is also the underlying root of all the questions we might be asking ourselves or worrying about subconsciously in our minds. Questions such as: 
  • When will things get back to normal?
  • Will things EVER get back to the way they were used to?
  • How am I going to react to all of these changes?
  • What will I do if x, y and z happen?
  • Will we ever go to the movie theatres again?
  • Will my favourite coffee shop be able to reopen after all of this? 

We don't have any of these answers and will only know when the times comes. Being at peace and accepting that these are questions unanswered takes time. The answer I most often give myself is: I do not need to put time and energy into thinking about these questions because when those times come I am strong and am able to handle whatever life throws at me. I am doing good right NOW and that's what counts.

​Other ways I calm my mind and spirit have been :
  • Listening to mellow music such as Jack Johnson, Lo Fi or even Positive vibes music 
  • Creating new working spaces inside our apartment to work; whether this is creating a patio space outside, changing the couches around or even sitting on the floor in our bedroom
  • Jotting down worries, sentences and feelings that arise; this frees up space in my head for more clarity​
  • Having my  media consumption (news related) be 0 to none 
  • Minding my own business, focusing on things I CAN control.... 
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Sarah Partage - Partie 4 - Pour les femmes qui grisoNnent

5/27/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Série #SarahPartage • Partie 4 • Pour les femmes qui grisonnent
Ce blogue est pour les filles et les femmes qui GRISONNENT. (Je suppose que les hommes aussi grisonnent, mais ils ont moins peur de l'admettre et de l'assumer). 

Malheureusement, ma génétique humaine fait en sorte que j'ai des cheveux lumineusement blancs qui poussent de mon crâne. À l'âge de 25 ans, j'ai définitivement plus de cheveux gris que vous le penserez. Pis, vous ne l'aurais jamais su, car auparavant, c'était facile de les cachés toutes les 10 semaines grâce à ma fabuleuse coiffeuse à Cornwall. Et le pire c'est que je refuse d'utiliser du colorant "maison". ??‍♀️

J'entends déjà des gens dirent: Sarah, les cheveux gris représentent la sagesse...La bible le dit à plusieurs reprises! Je sais qu'il y a pires choses dans la vie (je ne néglige pas les personnes malades ou affamées en ce moment, ça c'est un blogue pour un autre moment donné) mais cette quarantaine me permet de vivre tout un processus. Et c'est ce dont je voulais vous partager aujourd'hui!
 
Croyez-moi quand je dis: qu'auparavant, j'arrachais mes cheveux gris. (Oui, je les haïssais TANT que ça). Le processus est difficile parce que quand je me regarde dans le miroir ils sont LÀ et c'est comme ils me menacent! Le matin quand je brosse mes dans, quand je lave mes mains à la salle de toilette, quand je vérifie mes cheveux dans l'auto, tout ce que je vois c'est GRIS, GRIS, GRIS! Ce n'est pas évident de les accepter dans ma vie - je ne les ai même pas invités!! Ça me tente juste leur dire: vous n'êtes pas encore bienvenue chez moi les amis, partez! 


Ce processus de réflexion et d'acception est tout un manège. Je réfléchis souvent à ce que je dirais à mon amie qui grisonne... Honnêtement, je lui encouragerais probablement à embrasser ces cheveux naturels parce qu'il y a rien de honteux en ayant de cheveux gris. Je dirais: go rock it girl! 


Par contre, le faire soi-même n'est pas aussi facile. Je ne peux pas dire que je suis rendu à ACCEPTER mes gris, mais disons je fais plein de chemin quand ça vient à ouvrir mon coeur et mon esprit aux changements de mon corps. J'accepte 1-2 cheveu gris à la fois seulement... 

Tout bien considéré, être en confinement m'a aussi permis d'embraser mon côté plus naturel. Il faut admettre que 75 jours (et plus!!) sans rendez-vous de coiffeuses, de manucures, d'épilations lasers et autres restabilise ton corps de ces produits chimiques utilise pendant ces traitements. 

Premièrement, nos ongles peuvent enfin respirer. Ils se souviennent finalement c'est quoi l'air et le soleil! Avoir les ongles nus pour les derniers 75 jours a permis à mes ongles de devenir plus dur et en santé. En plus, pense à l'argent dont on sauve les filles?! Allô! Par contre, mon prochain budget aurait un chèque cadeau que j'achèterai de mon esthéticienne! Je pense à elle, sa business, sa passion qu'elle ne peut pas poursuivre en ce moment; ça doit être tellement difficile. 

Deuxièmement, nos cheveux nous REMERCIENT en ce moment. On utilise moins de fer à chauffer et à friser et moins de produits, car vous les lavez peut-être moins souvent, étant donné que nous sommes à la maison. Il n’est honnêtement pas bon de se laver les cheveux tous les jours, car ça extrait beaucoup de nos huiles naturelles. L'article de GQ en parle ICI. 


Bref, tout ce que j'essaie de dire c'est le temps, plus que jamais, d'accueillir avec les bras grands ouverts la version naturelle de nous-mêmes. J'espère que beaucoup de femmes vivent cette transition d’adoration de soi-même de façon naturelle (sans maquillage, ongles et teinture!) de façon positive! 


Parlant de ça, j'aimerais vous inviter à me partager une photo naturelle de vous-même, où vous mettez en valeur votre "natural glow". Donc une image sans filtre les filles! Voici la mienne!
​

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Sarah Shares - PART 3 - TO ALL THE EXTROVERTs

5/26/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Series #SarahShares • Part 3 • To All The Extroverts
Working from home is rough. It's not why I went into teaching and it is not in line with who I am as an individual and especially as an E X T RO V E R T. One of the biggest reasons why I went into teaching is to be surrounded by the students, the educators and everyone in between. Not to sit in front of a computer all day... 

If you're like me, social interaction GIVES you energy. You feel replenished and ignited after talking and spending time with people. Whereas, if you are an introvert, you feel totally drained after interacting with others... Provided that you fall into the same category as me, you might be struggling in the "social" department. 

An article from the NY Times called: Check on an extrovert today, starts off with this... 

"Of course, neither introverts nor extroverts are OK right now. As millions of people face a third month of sheltering at home, it’s become clear that confinement is no paradise even for those who love solitude. "

It's SO true... Nor I or Matthieu (who has always proudly called himself an introvert) are reaping the rewards of this isolation. I've also even seen multiple people who are shared that they THOUGHT they were introverts but in reality, they might be more extroverted than they think. Are you one of those people? I want to know when it clicked? I find that very interesting. 

In these times of adaptations, I have had to find OTHER ways to gain that energy, usually provided by those social interactions, as I can no longer access it from face-face meet ups or conversations (for obvious reasons). Ways I've coped have been through: 
  • Twitter chats
  • Podcasting conversations
  • Phone calls
  • Virtual suppers and gathering
  • Simply walking around in my community and seeing other human beings! 
  • (& sometimes even just watching videos of crowds - LOL I SWEAR I've done this).
Am I missing something? I want to know... How have YOU found energy in this social distancing if you're an extrovert? Comment below ⬇

I didn't think I would be getting accustomed to it as well as I have (at one point I honestly didn't know what I was going to do!), however, I obviously often get those urges to just want to reconnect with my friends, family and colleagues. Because... REAL TALK: Facetime-ing/Zoom-ing and/or Google Meet-ing just don't cut it. It's hard to pinpoint exactly what's missing, but it's just not the same. If I to guess.. It would be the actual PEOPLE part of the equation. 

All that being said, don't worry, I am taking the necessary precautions, but the cravings are real. I yearn for the day I can share some good laughs with my girlfriends around an actual table in a real restaurant with decent ambiant chatter around us. (IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK!?)

But in all honestly, being an extrovert and all, I sometimes worry about the "new normal" we might have to live in for the next while... Masks, distancing, walking off the side walk to cross someone, no hugs or handshakes... What are us francophones going to do - no more kisses on the cheeks?  ​I try not to put too much attention and energy into this because no one​ knows what the futur holds. So, I will just leave that thought there... And check in, in about a year.  

Articles consulted:

https://www.bcm.edu/news/psychiatry-and-behavior/a-new-normal-for-social-interaction 
https://www.mcgill.ca/delve/article/covid-19/six-ways-introverts-and-extroverts-can-make-most-working-isolation
​https://www.nytimes.com/2020/05/14/style/extroverts-introverts-isolation-coronavirus.html
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Sarah Shares - Part 2 - Be the Light In The Time Of Darkness

5/25/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Series #SarahShares • Part 2 • Be The Light In The Time Of Darkness☀️


​BE THE LIGHT IN THE TIME OF DARKNESS

In this COLLECTIVE CRISIS, I want to serve my community, my friends and my family, my partner and our daughter more than ever... 

Because I am safe at home, with a happy family, a paying job that I get value from and stable mental health, I have been intentionally making choices to serve others. What does this look like? you might ask. This means, taking time to chat with distant friends over FaceTime, donating items to free groups on Facebook in my community, calling my grandparents more regularly, listening to the cashier express their frustrations... 

I feel as though, 73 days in, we have TWO types of people. Those who are thriving and those who are struggling (and then there might be a few in between). 

Wether you are a human being that is  THRIVING or a human being that is STRUGGLING, every human being deserve GRACE (pandemic or not, honestly!). You never know what others are going through.... I heard some stories on various podcasts I listen to that give me goosebumps. With job losses, hours cut and cases spreading, people are suffering; people are scared and people are reacting. It makes me think of the Tragically Hip song: Scared.  So, for all those people who are afraid and anxious, I ask: why NOT be a light for them? and How can you be a light for them? 

Maybe it's your neighbour, your aunt, your best friend.... Let's be mindful of their situation, offer help when and where you can add value. More often times than you think, just lending a listening ear can allow them to feel heard and help process what they're going through. You do not need to take on their burdens, but you can let them know that they are not alone. 

Anthony ONeal, speaker and financial coach, in one of his LIVE videos said: Speak what you seek. If you want love and kindness to find you, speak it. Make sure your discours reflects your desires. This could be HOPE, POSITIVITY, JOY, ENCOURAGEMENTS, Try it out! I have seen much benefit. 

I would love to know: how are YOU serving others? Or, how have OTHERS served you? How have THEY been a light in this time of darkness? 

Answer below ⬇️ or tweet me @sarahlalondee :) 
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Sarah Shares - Part 1 - EVERYTHING NEW IS HARD AT FIRST

5/24/2020

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Que sera Sarah? · Series #SarahShares • Part 1 • Everything New is Hard At First


​welcome. bienvenue.

This blog post was supposed to be released many times, many days and many weeks ago. This personal project could have taken many shapes and forms, but here it is... I've decided to divide my outpouring of thoughts into bite size blogs that can be read or listened to in only a few short minutes. That being said, I will be publishing one part of the blog, for the next 7 days on THIS website and in podcast form! 

The blog posts you will read for the next 7 days are truly ideas that have been bouncing around in my head like balls in a Bingo cage for the past 72 days (since March 13th). Sometimes my brain would spit out sentences of how I was feeling OR I heard worthy statements on a live shows or podcasts and would write it down in my notes. 

Blogging and podcast has always been an outlet for me. Publicly reflecting and sharing is a powerful tool that I learnt early on in my teaching practice. Although these blogs/podcasts aren not necessarily teaching related, I wanted to share them anyways. We need now, more than ever, to find ways to unload and process our thoughts in order to be able to FEEL them, REFLECT upon them and LIVE them. I choose to blog and podcast instead of masking them with alcool or food consumption, online shopping or being a workaholic.

I also have a desire to contribute and share when I think I can add value to other's lives. So, here's to hoping you find some valuable nuggets of information and inspiration throughout the next 7 days.

I love the fact that I am taking the time to write and produce a podcast creatively and personally. It feels so good. I realized how much I miss it, so, here we go!
​

everything new is hard.


​When Mel Robbins was doing on her daily LIVE videos on Twitter and Instagram, I would watch them religiously. Early on into quarantine she said: "Everything new is hard".

I thought about it for a second, two seconds... three seconds and then told myself, you know what - she is totally right! This is all so new. Not only new to me, but new to everyone in the world. No one else has ever lived through a pandemic... And then something clicked. At that moment, I started to give myself  PERMISSION to struggle; to struggle through the new adaptations of work life, through new family life, through the lack of routine and so much more! After I heard those words, it was finally OK to say to myself that I didn't have it all together.  

The beauty of hard times (pandemic or not) is that it will make you stronger, a more resilient person. Mel kept explaining that this is a SEASON that will prepare for the next. Always staying present and knowing this is probably one of the most hardest things you will ever go through is almost soothing to hear, because you know you will be free eventually. (This will NOT last forever) And, you can only come out more courageous and tough at the end of it all, right?

Although this "new normal" is hard, is discombobulating, is scary, is frustrating...How you react and adapt to this season, will allow you to build your emotional resilience. You know that ability to stay CALM and POSITIVE in the face of all uncertainty... Yeah, THAT!

A couple tools that Mel Robbins shared throughout these lives events to help you succeed through the HARD time were:
  1. Recognizing what you can control: thoughts and behaviours. (Let go of everything else!)
  2. Make a plan (for every day!) to help you stay focused, create a routine and have control of your time! 

All that to say: when you're on the rollercoaster, you gotta ride the ups and the down - but ultimately, the rollercoaster is going to end. At this point, we still don’t know when or how much longer we are on it... But it's going to end. And when it’s over, it might not be the same. But it will end. 
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    Sarah Anne
    Leroux

    Si j'attends pour la perfection, je n'écrierais  jamais un mot... 

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